Family chaos inspired this poem. I love my family soooo much that I've made things more difficult than I should have... without intention. My purpose is always to be honest. It's well known that I speak truth and I'm honest. However when you're the person who is in the middle and a liaison between two parties, esp family, it truly sucks!
I couldn't sleep last night (nor have I been sleeping much for as long as I can remember now) and I must be careful whom I speak or share certain feelings. I wish I could be myself, that has always been my goal, and yet when others (loved ones) put barriers up with limitations and restrictions that are impossible to remove, what is a person to do? So my result is this poem:
Genie in the Bottle
Ever wonder why the genie is blue
Perhaps symbolically true
Locked inside this bottle of mine
I won't come out until 2009
Waiting until the smoke clears
Constant ringing in the ears
Smothered in war
Not wanting any more
Screaming and yelling at me
As if I were only three
There is no rhyme or reason
Only treason
Many times over wishing I were not
If only I could be forgot
This is not living
A time of not giving
Years of this stuff
My skin not that rough
A soul cannot take
Death in the make
Fighting to live
Feel and give
An implore to explore
Learning all the more
Restraints and limitations
Gone are the chains
Free to roam
In search of a home
Alone in the search
Then comes a lurch
Verbal brutality is too abuse
Always first to make a truce
Whose loyal to whom
Awaiting the doom
Who's telling the truth
Lacking in couth
Interest in Genie brought
For answers sought
Anger stirred
Heart curd
Literal screaming hurts
Body bruised with words
Enough is enough
Clearly conditional love
Lost and confused
Not amused
Slow and painful death
Near last breath
Ready to burst
Bolt into first
Off to find
An actual clear mind
If I could be
Loved and free
What is it like
On Kilamanjaro hike?
Gone I'll be
'Tis only me
Finding that gleam
Seen In my dream
Goodbye and farewell
Listen for the bell
Hear it ring
My heart will sing
Off I am
Away from fam
Rising up new heights
Flying many kites
A message if you will
Might arrive in the sill
Keep an eye alert
It may be just dirt
Sleep I can't
Along with a pant
Not a night
Without light
Pained
Drained
Forcing
Morsing
Have you deciphered my code?
Hiding in my abode
Mask removed
Only once behoved
(Written By, C.M. Call)
(Copywright March 2008)
I couldn't sleep last night (nor have I been sleeping much for as long as I can remember now) and I must be careful whom I speak or share certain feelings. I wish I could be myself, that has always been my goal, and yet when others (loved ones) put barriers up with limitations and restrictions that are impossible to remove, what is a person to do? So my result is this poem:
Genie in the Bottle
Ever wonder why the genie is blue
Perhaps symbolically true
Locked inside this bottle of mine
I won't come out until 2009
Waiting until the smoke clears
Constant ringing in the ears
Smothered in war
Not wanting any more
Screaming and yelling at me
As if I were only three
There is no rhyme or reason
Only treason
Many times over wishing I were not
If only I could be forgot
This is not living
A time of not giving
Years of this stuff
My skin not that rough
A soul cannot take
Death in the make
Fighting to live
Feel and give
An implore to explore
Learning all the more
Restraints and limitations
Gone are the chains
Free to roam
In search of a home
Alone in the search
Then comes a lurch
Verbal brutality is too abuse
Always first to make a truce
Whose loyal to whom
Awaiting the doom
Who's telling the truth
Lacking in couth
Interest in Genie brought
For answers sought
Anger stirred
Heart curd
Literal screaming hurts
Body bruised with words
Enough is enough
Clearly conditional love
Lost and confused
Not amused
Slow and painful death
Near last breath
Ready to burst
Bolt into first
Off to find
An actual clear mind
If I could be
Loved and free
What is it like
On Kilamanjaro hike?
Gone I'll be
'Tis only me
Finding that gleam
Seen In my dream
Goodbye and farewell
Listen for the bell
Hear it ring
My heart will sing
Off I am
Away from fam
Rising up new heights
Flying many kites
A message if you will
Might arrive in the sill
Keep an eye alert
It may be just dirt
Sleep I can't
Along with a pant
Not a night
Without light
Pained
Drained
Forcing
Morsing
Have you deciphered my code?
Hiding in my abode
Mask removed
Only once behoved
(Written By, C.M. Call)
(Copywright March 2008)
4 comments:
I also LOVE my family with ALL my heart! I ALWAYS have GOOD intentions (no matter what you or anyone else may BELIEVE). I am NOT malicious or vindictive or vengeful or fake. I am ALWAYS honest and open and speak of my feelings. I do NOT twist words or gossip or spread hurtful rumors. If ANYONE wants to know ANYTHING about me, I tell the TRUTH. I have NOTHING to hide. I enjoy doing NICE things for people, but do NOT enjoy when they turn it around thinking I have ulterior motives. I am ALWAYS grateful for everything.
I just do NOT understand how everything ALWAYS gets turned around on me and if something unpleasant happens in their life they assume it must have something to do with me. C'mon, seriously? The latest accusations are absurd! You canNOT imagine how badly that HURTS!
You have it so wrong.
hey christy--
Since you got the message we left here earlier....and if someone else (outside of the family) was to read it, they would be confused.....so, i deleted it. but I know you already got it cuz we got your email about it. :)
AND WE STILL MEAN EVERYTHING THAT WAS WRITTEN!!!! (yes Andrea..we still mean it!)
love ya!
Merrianne
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